Weird Search Day

or "How I Stumbled Upon the URI! Zone"

The number of weird searches has decreased in 2012, and it seems as if many people are using browsers that hide the search term by default. Since this is no good for the sake of comedy, I may have to vote against any privacy rules rolled out in the future.

why is milk cheaper at the leesburg virginia costco than at the winchester virginia costco
According to data released by the USDA, the number of milk-giving cows which have calved has decreased in Maryland while holding steady in Virginia and West Virginia. This means that many cows have moved out of Maryland and converged upon the inner-Beltway area (sometimes called "black and white flight"). Leesburg, being closer to the cows, has cheaper milk. The graphic below provides a visual representation of this migration.

hokie bird porn
There must be some strange "college mascot" porn fetish going on out in the world. I'm scared to actually confirm it.

tempo for treatment of clover mites
Probably a waltz, because the heavy downbeat will squish more of them in a single attempt, while the lighter, fluffier upbeats will keep them guessing.

maynard ferguson cologne smell
If this cologne exists, it smells of nosebleeds and poor tone quality.

according to zoologists what do a tiger's scent markings smell like
According to this cat owner, who has successfully expelled a cat's anal glands on multiple occasions, they don't smell like buttered popcorn. (The measure of success based upon the expression of anal glands is not yet an ISO standard).

armadillo roadkill per year graphs
The rate of armadillo homicides on US interstates has increased after a brief respite. (For people living in Fairfax County in search of a near-miss analogy, an armadillo is a kind of deer in Texas).

Introducing the iPhone gas stove
Wyoming legislator David Miller introduces "doomsday" bill

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