Weird Search Day

or "how I stumbled upon the URI! Zone"

hokie mascot hire for weddings

For a limited time, you can have the Hokie Guy officiate your wedding for only $3999.95. (Hokie Pokie not included in the base price).

ben stiller inpersonal of josquin phoenix
It's possible that you were searching for Ben Stiller impersonates Joaquin Phoenix, although I wouldn't put it past Ben Stiller to make a biographical movie about Josquin des Prez, set in modern-day Phoenix.

applebees reuses chicken fingers
This is part of Applebee's new green strategy, borrowed from the American Indians who used every piece of the buffalo. Like all environmentally-conscious restaurants, they grind up all the leftover bits of chicken fingers from peoples' plates and sell them to McDonald's as 100% White Meat nuggets.

chipmunk tunnels flooded my basement
Wasn't this the plot to the sequel to Caddyshack? If not, then someone is missing out on some prime Hollywood script material.

pictures of yoshi pooping on the toilet

You're welcome.

what is the success rate of elopers
It would seem to me that people who elope stand a pretty good chance of getting married, unless they are being chased by zombies, grizzly bears, or the paparazzi.

if my husband penis smell like raw fish is that a sign that he is cheating on me
Yes. And if you're having salmon for dinner, I'd recommend thoroughly washing the filets, just in case.

"mike catania" mold photography
Mold photography should be Mike's next short-lived hobby, to go with aquariums, martial arts, and Settlers of Cataan(ia).

i need to pee and i'm tied up pictures
If you're tied up so securely that you can't make it to the bathroom, how ever did you get on the Internet?

Helpful hints for kicking the meth habit?
Easy enough -- just visit the Faces of Meth website that shows what you'll look like after meth is done with you.

my gerbille barely moves and has just ate its companion yahoo ansews
This isn't just limited to gerbils -- I'm sure you'd feel pretty immobile after having your significant other for dinner too. We don't need Yahoo to answer this one.

Jack Bauer & Morgan Freeman voices on answering machine message

I'm guessing someone confused Morgan Freeman with Dennis Haysbert, although it's a solid conspiracy theory that Morgan Freeman might actually play every black role in Hollywood. The script for this answering machine message would involve Jack Bauer yelling, "Damnit! There's no time to leave a message!" after which the machine would hang up on you without recording.

stuffonmywife
This is going to be the sister site of stuffonmycat.com, and will display pictures of sleeping wives with nonsensical everyday objects unknowingly stacked on their heads.

where did the saying when birds fly low expect rain and a blow originate
Storms occur in low pressure weather systems, and Bernanke's principle proves that air pressure around the wings makes it much easier to fly. When birds are flying through low pressure areas (like the calm before a storm or the suburbs) they have to flap harder to stay aloft, so they get tired much faster. When you see low-flying birds, you know that they're very tired from all the flapping, so you can expect a storm. And with so many low-flying birds, chances are very high that someone will get hit in the back of the head by one. Thus, the blow.

Arrests made after arson shows up on YouTube
Bacon sandwich really does cure a hangover
Chimps exchange meat for sex

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